Resiliency score

My score was 83. I am very resilient. I knew that though. I survived my step father trying to beat me to death. You have to be resilient to survive some thing like that and to grow from it and not let it destroy who you are and what you are to become. My learning style is very " hands on". I learn best by simply doing. I also learn by repetition. You can show meh a million times how to do something but unless you let me do it has you tell me I won't really get it. One of the gift God has given me is the gift of music, or voice to be more precise. I love music and if I have it playing you can bet I am singing along with it. I took voice lessons for about 6 months and I also took saxophone. I sing very well and play the sax so well it sounds like a dying cow. Lol. Another gift God gave me was the gift of empathy for other living beings. It doesn't matter if it is a human or animal. This gift is the one that for years I hated. I couldn't understand why God would allow me to feel that much pain, especially when that pain came from abused children showing up on my door step needing some one to listen and care or when I was a child hearing my puppy crying after my step father shot it and left it to die. It has taken me years to understand that this is the most precious of gifts because not every one can feel the pain of others so acutely and sympathize. 2 Timothy 1-7. What a powerful verse! When Satan and people make make you feel so small and insignificant, this verse shows that we are so much more than we are told we are. Make a person want to shout PRAISE THE LORD! Chapter 8 page 175 in Courage and Calling tells us that God doesn't want us to be fearfully or timid. He wants us to stand strong in all aspects of our life, be it spiritual, financial or just in every day things. Pg. 176 Smith tells us that God also doesn't want us to worry and fret over thing. I am really bad about worrying until I am sick. God never intended me to be this way. How can I truly be the servant of my Heavenly Master if I am so worried that I'm not giving Him time or credit for my care? Pg 180 ( Courage and Calling ) talks about humility. I struggle with this because all my life I have been told I am very vain. To me being humble and being filled with humility also means being filled with grace. If you are filled with grace and humility, and if you are truly humble, you will also be filled with courage and wisdom, moral integrity, gratitude and patience. You will be filled with everything you need to answer the calling to the life God intended for you. Don't forget though that you are human and so far from perfect that it is not even in your spectrum of life. It is something you strive for every day knowing you will only reach it when you get to heaven. We each have a cross or two that we must bear and many times we feel we are doing it alone. I have had a few myself. The child abuse when i was young, the death of my baby, a divorce, facing two surgeries I was told I would not live through, being told I have bone cancer and being healed from it. My hardest is waking up every morning and going to bed every night alone. Not having someone to share life with. That is my greatest cross to bear. It is a very heavy one and if I didn't have God I simply could not go on another day. It would pull me down to far to be able to get back up. I don't know Gods full plan for me but I do know that each thing I have faced in life has been for the glory of The Lord, to magnify Him. If my life can be a witness for God then nothing else matters. I will have fulfilled my purpose and my calling. I pray I do it all with grace, dignity and humility always.